MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU

My son and I are constantly looking up stuff we are reminded of while watching movies or TV. This drives my mom crazy.

10/07/2024 8:35pm Star Wars – A New Hope – In a galaxy far, far away aka Tennessee. My son innocently asked the question that would put into motion a chain of events no one could be prepared for – whose family did Luke live with on Tatooine – Anakin’s or Padme’s?

Son: They seem like Anakin kind of people.

Me: Google search, Luke Skywalker is raised by his uncle and aunt, Owen and Beru Lars, on the planet Tatooine… not enough info… continue looking and find it on Wikipedia.

Me: “Obi-Wan takes Luke to the desert planet Tatooine, where he is adopted by Vader’s stepbrother, Owen Lars, and his wife Beru.”

Son: “Oh, okay.”

Mom: “Did you really have to look that up?”

Me: “Yeah.”

Son: “Of course.”

Mom shakes her head.

Me: “Why didn’t they just say Padme’s brother or sister? Oh wait,” I squint my eyes at my phone, “it said Anakin’s stepbrother not brother in law. Silly me.”

I turn to my son, “Did you hear that? Uncle Owen and Anakin were stepbrothers.”

Son: “Did we just become best friends? No, because you’re f’n crazy!” If you don’t get that reference, we can’t be friends. The first part not the second bit he added to showcase Anakin’s descent into madness.

Continue watching…Cantina scene

Me: “Who shot first?”

Son: Without missing a beat, “Han shot first.” I nod my head in admiration. Han had to shoot first, no question.

Me: Thinking to myself about reimagining the ‘Stepbrothers’ title scene with Uncle Owen and Anakin as grownup versions but I don’t think anyone would get it. Laughing by myself ain’t no fun.

Princess Leia is telling off the old guy in charge of Vader – why don’t I look it up? Nah too much effort; I’d have to leave the screen I’m on, I’m doing this on my phone so it’s already so. much. work. Instead I say, “Carrie Fisher is such a bad ass!” Aww, I really miss her.

Luke, as they are coming up on the Death Star, “I have a bad feeling about this. “

I turn to my son, “What did Luke say?”

Son: “I have a bad feeling about this? “

Me: “Name of Amy’s sex tape!” FYI that’s a Brooklyn 99 reference.

Continue watching, Vader is talking to the old guy again. When looking up exact quote on Google I see the ‘old guy’ is Grand Moff Tarkin but I’m too lazy to update my previous references.

Darth Vader: “Obi-wan is here. The Force is with him.”

Me: “That is the dumbest line. ‘The force is with him’? It sounds like he brought his entourage.” I will probably be roasted for that but it’s too late, I don’t believe in the gratuitous use of the Backspace button.

Obi Wan and Darth Vader meet up in the hall, Darth Vader is yammering on about circles completing and the student is now the master.

Obi Wan: “A master of evil, Darth.”

Me: “Wait, why did he call him Darth, I thought all the bad guys were named Darth, why didn’t he call him Vader? That would have made way more sense!” I pause and look at my son, “Why am I nitpicking Star Wars?”

I’m forced to reflect on my life choices up to this moment. Decisions that have brought me to these crossroads, forced to contemplate a life full of… Oh now they are in the fighters to destroy the Death Star.

Me: “Hmm, wouldn’t Death Star make a cool band name?”

Son: “Yeah.”

Me: “Is it weird when I think of it being a band name for some reason I think of Keanu’s band.”

Son: “Not too weird.”

One of the fighters gets blown up and the other fighter says, “they came from behind!”

Me: “Title of Amy’s sex tape.” And with that I am exhausted. I bid you a goodnight and…

MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU! (yet another title of Amy’s sex tape)